|
How do I find myself?
- Faye
Dear Faye,
For starters, look in the mirror. Sometimes a mirror is a good friend, and sometimes a friend is a good mirror.
True self is created, not found. Instead of seeking to find some magical answer to what you are, some identity label that will somehow make easier the choices that lie before you, try instead moving in whatever direction brings you true joy (without, of course, hurting yourself or others). Let your feelings guide you in the direction that feels best to you, and don't worry about what you ARE. Consider instead what you will DO.
Identity is a shorthand for communicating common characteristics. While it can be a good tool to help us find like-minded people for sharing and caring, it is not an end in itself. Rather, it is merely a descriptive language that is inherently inadequate to describe any of us. No identity truly pegs you, truly fits the marvelous complexity of the person that lives within your skin. Don't shortchange yourself by trying to describe yourself in simple terms. You are not simple, and never will be.
Don't allow yourself to be limited to operating within someone else's definition of an identity. Some of life's most joyous rewards lie in the transgression of what is accepted as normal. If you seek too hard to fit yourself within known categories or identities, you cheat yourself of the joy of knowing yourself beyond such limitations. The only true limit to what you are is the limit of your imagination. Free your imagination from the limits of identity, category and definition, and instead challenge yourself to follow truly the direction of your soul, as indicated by the joy that following your own path produces in your heart.
Love,
Nancy
|
