Framed in darkness
Locked door, whispery shadowed lust
Trusting nothing, least of all self
Joy shelved with dust and spiders
Webbed in fear that next knock
Will reveal all
Caught! Known! Shown!
Alone under sheet with secret ecstasy
When all the other kiddies sleep
Dreaming safely normal dreams
Of daylight when and where and who
And you fevered scream, doing
Odd, dark night things
Wishing wings could bear away
This guilt, this pain
While brain, soul twist and squirm
Cosmic ooze scraped off God’s shoe.
While all you’re seeking
Peeking out from darkened blind
Is that measure of peace
Others seem to find
Try, deny, cry in anguish
Purge. Bury. Cast away
Walk away, back to little good boy-hood
“I’ll be good! I’ll be good!
Just don’t let me hurt no more!”
Back to it all
Back to the wall
Back to the closet
And secret horror shame.